Let's just ban it.

Written by Pistol Pete Thursday, 05 June 2008 00:00

A report out of London claims there is an increase of stabbing deaths in the city. Well, no shit, Sherlock. When thugs can't get guns they resort to knives. I swear, that island is so inbred that everyone is their own grandparent. Now, if you're over 16 and have a knife with a blade longer than 3-inches, you face four years in prison. Four years of government sponsored depravement that will surely make model citizens of those with pocket knives. Why not just ban people? That'll take care of the problem. Britain, over many years, has banned the whole meaning of the Magna Carta and the whole point of bi-cameral government. The last infusion of good DNA they had was during WWII when our guys porked the hell out of their women. Before that, it was the Romans.

Obama has banned money from lobbyists, the very people who have kept his head above water. This should be a lesson to those who support that commie bastard. If you help him out, he'll throw you into the gutter as soon as the next level of power comes to him.

John McCain has banned any negative referrence to his opposition in this campaign. Is the guy totally fucked in the head? Wait, that was a redundant question. I swear, this nation is doomed if all we have to choose from is a communist criminal, and criminal communist, and a dickhead. Fortunately, the criminal communist is out of the race. I don't like the remaining choices.

Some frog, who heads the European Central Bank, made a statement today about the dollar and then the price of oil went way up. Who the hell is this guy who can say a few words about something that doesn't apply to him and then the speculators hike the price?! One speculator said oil is very weak. VERY WEAK?! It's a gold mine. I have said it many times, ban speculators. Put their still living bodies in acid vats and record the screams for B-movies. And while we're at it, ban the damn frogs. We should have let the Germans keep the sons of bitches.

A Californication county, Mendocino, has voted to ban the cultivation of marijuana. Maybe whoever put that on a ballet had nothing better to do than suck up tax dollars. Or, maybe the pot was cutting into his crack empire. The vote itself is surprising considering Cali is a haven for dopes. Why not ban Cali citizens from voting on anything? It would certainly make the normal parts of the country safer. It is now illegal to fire lead bullets anywhere a condor might be. That takes in the entire state. There is a pending bill (most likely to be passed and signed by steroid-boy) that would force anyone who wants to purchase ammunition to submit a full background check, photo ID, finger prints and pay a $5 fee for every box of ammunition bought, which cannot exceed 50 rounds per purchase. Anyone who gives away ammo, to anyone, will have to be registered as a licensed dealer. Hell, let's just ban the whole state. Forget the Mexican wall. Sever the west coast all the way to Canada. I would declare the Port of Los Angeles and Highway 15 as under Martial Law to keep goods flowing to and from the rest of the country. None, however, would be allowed to be unloaded in California.